Wednesday, February 13, 2008

struggling as a parent

Kagen has me so "GRRRRR" at the moment and I am really finding it hard to find the right way to deal with him!

The last few weeks before he went back to school he really started with the addtiude! I thought it may because he was sick of holidays and was wanting to go back to school! Well school started back and that ADDTIUDE is just darn right worse!

From little things to big things he just so darn rude about it all! For example he threw a tin lid at Tiarna's head and I caught him doing it! I asked him "why?" His answer to me was "I didn't do it! It grew legs and walked over and hit her in the head!"

Just full on liar about it when I saw him do it! And he didn't even seem too upset about lying to me! So I took a star off the reward chart, didn't faze him! By this time I pretty steamed but trying to keep it together! So in my best angry voice I tell him that this is not on! Lying or throwing things! He looked at me with a smile on his face... I had to walk away... I was really struggling of a way to get though to him!

He also has been bucking up about the violin! I have had to push him to practice and to go to lessons.. And I know that he is still young and you do need to push a little but this feels like too much pushing... So I asked him "do you want to play the violin anymore? If you do then you need to practice it? Not just play 2 notes and say I am done!"

And his answer is "no I don't want to play anymore!" I ask for a reason! He cant give me one? Am I expecting to much? And not 5 min's after saying he doesn't want to play the violin anymore he asks to play the drums!

I don't think I should change him to the drums... I don't think he desvers it!

Ok gals give it to me am I off my tree?????


Tracey & Mike said...

My hat is off to you for keeping your cool with the little darling! Personally I would say no to the drums. I wouldn't reward the behaviour (just my 2 cents ...)

Maggie said...

The little self-satisfied smiles are an absolute killer. But the reaction is probably what he's going for. I wouldn't let him play drums now either. He can't flit from one activity to the other. These things have a price tag and require some work. Maybe let him choose whether he wants to take a break from the violin or not. But he doesn't get to replace that with something else.

MMrussianadoption said...

I agree with Maggie.

Noah and Josh's Mom said...

How old is he? No way to the drums and I too agree with Maggie. It is totally about the reaction! Keep your cool and walk away.